Category Archives: positive thinking

Grab a cup of tea and let’s talk about mental health

Jess Glynne inspiring me to write about mental health

Last year, it was This is me, I make no apologies song that inspired me for #timetotalkday. This year my inspiration is Jess Glynne’s song ‘Thursday’. Although it is a love song, some of the words struck a chord with me and seemed apt.

Often clients who have had time off work for anxiety, stress or depression, worry about returning to work. ‘What will people think of me?’ they ask me? ‘What will my colleagues say?’ ‘No-one will understand’? The stigma of mental health is something they fear. The importance of Time to Talk is to create conversation and discussion. This will help stop the stigma around mental health. Stop the fears that my clients and others who suffer from poor mental health.

I’m sick of covering up

Jess’s second line of the song says ‘I’m sick of covering up’. That is what #Timetotalk is saying. Let’s stop covering mental health up. Let’s talk.  We don’t need to hide or be ashamed if we have a mental health problem.

Jess’s second line of the song says ‘I’m sick of covering up’. That is what #Timetotalk is saying. Let’s stop covering mental health up. Let’s talk.  We don’t need to hide or be ashamed if we have a mental health problem.

I’m tired of feeling so broken

‘I’m tired of feeling so broken’ continues in the song.  Yes, those suffering mental health problems are exhausted from feeling broken. Many want to move on but don’t know how too or feel afraid too. It is isolating as people as people that they feel they are the only ones broken or depressed. Talking about mental health and their struggles, would help stop people feeling isolated. This can be achieved through talking to friends, sharing on social media or through a qualified counsellor.

‘I wanna love, I don’t wanna cry, don’t want those tears inside my eyes’

Jess’s song continues. Often clients who come to counselling sit embarrassed by their tears or will announce they will not cry today. They see tears as a sign of weakness. It is not. Crying is an emotion. Sometimes you cannot stop the tears falling. The emotions need to come out. Perhaps it comes from our childhood trying not to cry in front of others. I remember as a child being told to wipe away my tears or being called ‘cry baby’.  How shameful is that? In fact, all I just wanted was a hug and a chance to talk. So where is this going? Well, maybe next time you see someone crying, why not sit with them, and ask if there is anything you can do for them. Show them empathy.

‘I try to embrace all my insecurities’.

 Insecurities can cause highly emotional responses, and make us feel bad about ourselves. This in turn causes a lot of mental stress or anguish.  Embrace your insecurities and try to tackle them one by one. Notice it when feel an insecurity. Rather than react to it (for example, run away or ignore it) try to tackle it. Feel it. Look at where it comes from and think how you can change or build upon it. Don’t beat yourself up. Try to put positive words into your head and be rational. 

‘I was always taught to just be myself. Don’t change for anyone.

How inspirational these words in the song are? It important to have the confidence to be yourself. Believe in yourself. If you are going to change, only do it because you want too. If you notice a behaviour in yourself that does not help or makes you feel bad, then change it. Only make changes because you want to. It is helps you be happier. Remember to do it at your own pace. 

The song ends ‘I wanna to feel beautiful’. Yes! Learn to love yourself. Feel positive about who you are, and grow from your mistakes. Don’t struggle.

How would you continue the conversation of talking about mental health? #timetotalk

Learning from our mistakes

learning from our mistakesThis morning I was running late with Radio 2 playing in my car. Right Said Fred were playing Johnny Cash’s version of Ring of Fire live but unfortunately the lead singer, Fred, forgot the words. Not once but twice! As a listener it didn’t matter to me. However, I did wonder how Fred felt. He was laughing but considering there are over 7 million listeners Continue reading

I worry what people think of me and if they like me

I worry what people think of me

I can’t do that as people may judge me!

No-one likes me.

What happens if I’m rejected?

Sound familiar? These are common statements that I often hear my clients say. Often clients judge themselves on how popular they are or they will spend a lot of time worrying what people think of them or if they like them. The need to be liked by everyone only creates worry, anxiety and often loneliness. I find with my clients that it is common for them to worry more about people they do not know well. They spend lots of energy trying to please people who are not important to them.

Focus on those who matter

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Understanding Panic Attacks

understanding panic attacksWhat are panic attacks?

Panic attacks are common, occurring in at least five per cent of the population. Many clients come to me who have experienced panic attacks. A common remark is that clients feel their panic attacks are misunderstood and dismissed by other people. Panic attacks are not signs of weakness Continue reading

New Year… Positive Changes rather than Resolutions

Broken resolutions

Positive changes in New YearI’m sure we can all think about New Year’s resolutions that we have made and broken.  I know that I can think of some!  Making new resolutions is often about changing our bad habits or becoming fitter. For example I often hear New Year resolutions of people stopping smoking or drinking Continue reading

Relationship between thoughts and feelings

thought and feeling relationshipFeelings affect us

Positive or negative feelings affect what happen to us. For example, if we are given a birthday present, we feel elated and happy, but if our child breaks our birthday present, we feel angry and upset.  In other words, the situation we are in has a direct effect on our feelings.

Thoughts control our feelings

However, it can be more complicated. Continue reading

Positive thinking and back pain

positive thinking and back painBack pain can make our lives difficult and restrictive in the everyday things that we do. Back pain is a common condition and affects over a third of the population. It is believed that one in eight people aged between 16 and 64 years old are not at work because of back pain. For many people who suffer from back pain there is no quick fix solution, but there are different ways to help people take more control of their back pain. Continue reading

Symptoms of anxiety? 4 creative ways of coping with anxiety.

coping with symptoms of anxiety

coping with symptoms of anxiety

Do you have symptoms of anxiety?

If you are living with feelings of dread and as though you are on edge you are more and likely to be living with anxiety. These symptoms of stress and anxiety may result in you withdrawing from your family and friends or finding going to work can be unbearable increasing your stress level. It can also have a knock on effect on your confidence level and self-esteem. Continue reading