Tag Archives: counsellor

Grab a cup of tea and let’s talk about mental health

Jess Glynne inspiring me to write about mental health

Last year, it was This is me, I make no apologies song that inspired me for #timetotalkday. This year my inspiration is Jess Glynne’s song ‘Thursday’. Although it is a love song, some of the words struck a chord with me and seemed apt.

Often clients who have had time off work for anxiety, stress or depression, worry about returning to work. ‘What will people think of me?’ they ask me? ‘What will my colleagues say?’ ‘No-one will understand’? The stigma of mental health is something they fear. The importance of Time to Talk is to create conversation and discussion. This will help stop the stigma around mental health. Stop the fears that my clients and others who suffer from poor mental health.

I’m sick of covering up

Jess’s second line of the song says ‘I’m sick of covering up’. That is what #Timetotalk is saying. Let’s stop covering mental health up. Let’s talk.  We don’t need to hide or be ashamed if we have a mental health problem.

Jess’s second line of the song says ‘I’m sick of covering up’. That is what #Timetotalk is saying. Let’s stop covering mental health up. Let’s talk.  We don’t need to hide or be ashamed if we have a mental health problem.

I’m tired of feeling so broken

‘I’m tired of feeling so broken’ continues in the song.  Yes, those suffering mental health problems are exhausted from feeling broken. Many want to move on but don’t know how too or feel afraid too. It is isolating as people as people that they feel they are the only ones broken or depressed. Talking about mental health and their struggles, would help stop people feeling isolated. This can be achieved through talking to friends, sharing on social media or through a qualified counsellor.

‘I wanna love, I don’t wanna cry, don’t want those tears inside my eyes’

Jess’s song continues. Often clients who come to counselling sit embarrassed by their tears or will announce they will not cry today. They see tears as a sign of weakness. It is not. Crying is an emotion. Sometimes you cannot stop the tears falling. The emotions need to come out. Perhaps it comes from our childhood trying not to cry in front of others. I remember as a child being told to wipe away my tears or being called ‘cry baby’.  How shameful is that? In fact, all I just wanted was a hug and a chance to talk. So where is this going? Well, maybe next time you see someone crying, why not sit with them, and ask if there is anything you can do for them. Show them empathy.

‘I try to embrace all my insecurities’.

 Insecurities can cause highly emotional responses, and make us feel bad about ourselves. This in turn causes a lot of mental stress or anguish.  Embrace your insecurities and try to tackle them one by one. Notice it when feel an insecurity. Rather than react to it (for example, run away or ignore it) try to tackle it. Feel it. Look at where it comes from and think how you can change or build upon it. Don’t beat yourself up. Try to put positive words into your head and be rational. 

‘I was always taught to just be myself. Don’t change for anyone.

How inspirational these words in the song are? It important to have the confidence to be yourself. Believe in yourself. If you are going to change, only do it because you want too. If you notice a behaviour in yourself that does not help or makes you feel bad, then change it. Only make changes because you want to. It is helps you be happier. Remember to do it at your own pace. 

The song ends ‘I wanna to feel beautiful’. Yes! Learn to love yourself. Feel positive about who you are, and grow from your mistakes. Don’t struggle.

How would you continue the conversation of talking about mental health? #timetotalk

Motivations to being a counsellor

Motivations to being a counsellor

When I first began my counselling diploma at Sheffield Hallam University in 2003, I never knew how much I would be more aware of myself or how it would change my thinking or who it would affect the way I interact with my peers, friends and colleagues. I did not imagine that becoming a counsellor Continue reading

Counselling Supervision

Counselling supervisionWhen my previous counselling supervisor retired, it took a long time for me to find a new one. I finally found a new counselling supervisor that I did connect with and one I was able to be myself. I’ve had a great couple of years with her so I was therefore disappointed to hear that she too is retiring. Unfortunately as I had a poor experience during my training during my counselling supervision leaving me being cautious with whom I choose.  However, as I look for a new one it does feel new opportunity to help me gain a different perspective on my work, as well as start a new relationship with a different colleague.

I am about to start a counselling Supervision course and with me looking for a new supervisor, I thought it would be a good opportunity to reflect on what is counselling supervision and what is it that I am looking for. Continue reading

Self-disclosure of a counsellor

self disclosure of counsellorsIn order for a counsellor to remain focused on the client, self-disclosure during a session is not encouraged. Self-disclosure is sharing information with your client that they would not know about you. It is generally felt that self-disclosure of a counsellor may get in the way of the client’s journey. The counsellor’s past and issues, if disclosed to a client, may ruin the trust between the counsellor and the client or it may influence the client in their decision making.

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Counselling process and me

 

counselling processMental stigma often stops people from admitting that they are receiving counselling or have had counselling.  What about if the counsellor admits they had counselling? Is that self-disclosing or reassuring for clients to know that their counsellor has been through the counselling process and believes in his or her heart that counselling can help? This question led me to self-reflect on how the counselling process helped me develop to train as a counsellor and increase my self-awareness with my clients. Continue reading

Boundaries in counselling

boundaries in counsellingWith the recent report of two therapists being abused by another counsellor in a counselling relationship, I can imagine it has made people wonder if they are safe with their present therapist. It could also make potential clients wonder how to ensure that their therapist will not take advantage of them. It was clear in this case that the boundaries in counselling were broken. The topic does open the debate of whether the professional organisations, such as British Association of Counselling (BACP), should be regulated to ensure all clients are protected in counselling. At the moment regulation appears to be not on the immediate agenda. It is therefore important for us therapists and counsellors to ensure that our clients are fully aware of what to expect from us.

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Twitter Guide for Counsellor’s

 

counsellor and twitterEthics in counselling is paramount so if you are a counsellor that wants to use twitter for business, you will need to think about how to use twitter both ethically and professionally. Following on from my ethical guide to using social media, I have devised these twitter guidelines to assist you tweet in an ethical and professional manner.

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Counselling in Sheffield

counselling in sheffieldFinding the right counsellor for you.

We can find a lot of information about counselling and the service that counsellor’s offer in Sheffield and worldwide. Committing to counselling can be a difficult decision and often an intimidating one. It is often not easy to admit that are you feeling depressed, anxious or stressed. You want to find a counsellor that you trust and one that works to a high standard. But then you have a difficult dilemma of finding a counsellor. If you look at the Counselling directory you will see there are over 1200 counsellors with just over 100 counsellors in Sheffield alone. I am sure if you are considering counselling this can make you feel confused. What is counselling all about? Who and what counsellor do you choose? It’s a tricky choice and decision. Continue reading

What is the difference between counselling and counselling skills?

Wwhat is counselling skillshat are Counselling Skills?

Counselling skills can be used every day whether it is in our job as a helper or just listening to a distressed friend. The art of being listened too can be practised by almost anybody and the effectiveness of being actively listened to can have a huge impact on our lives as it can enable us to feel better about ourselves.  Counselling skills help us communicate effectively and enable us to relate better to the people we are talking to. Continue reading