As therapists we’re taught to reflect, yet it’s easy to slip into fault-finding — replaying a session, feeling cross with ourselves, and then repeating the same patterns. Reflective practice offers a kinder, more useful alternative: notice what happened, learn from it, and make a small change next time. One simple exercise I return to is Kolb’s Experiential Learning Cycle.
What is Kolb’s Cycle?
Kolb’s cycle views learning as a continuous loop with four stages:
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Concrete Experience – the specific event (e.g., a session moment or supervision discussion).
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Reflective Observation – what you noticed and felt; what stood out.
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Abstract Conceptualisation – making sense of it using theory, ethics, or patterns in your practice.
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Active Experimentation – a small, testable change you’ll try next time.
Move through the four steps, then repeat. It’s not about perfection; it’s about small, steady improvements.
How to use Kolb’s Cycle after a session
1) Concrete Experience
Choose one moment. Keep it specific.
Example: “My client became quiet when I named anger; I changed the subject.”
Prompts
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What exactly happened (words, tone, body language)?
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What did I do next?
2) Reflective Observation
Stay curious rather than critical.
Prompts
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What did I feel in the moment (tension, urge to reassure, pull to fix)?
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What seemed to shift for the client (pace, emotion, posture)?
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What did I avoid?
3) Abstract Conceptualisation
Link the moment to ideas you trust: theory, ethics, or your personal learning.
Prompts
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Which models fit here (e.g., rupture-repair, attachment, pluralistic preferences, trauma-informed pacing)?
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What does the BACP Ethical Framework invite here (e.g., collaboration, transparency, supervision)?
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What do I know about this client’s preferences and goals?
4) Active Experimentation
Name one small experiment for next time. Keep it doable and observable.
Examples
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“If the client goes quiet, I’ll name the silence kindly and check what’s happening.”
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“I’ll ask permission to stay with anger for two more minutes and watch the pace.”
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“I’ll bring this to supervision with a transcript snippet.”
A worked micro-example (2 minutes)
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Concrete Experience: I softened my language when the client described anger and moved on quickly.
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Reflective Observation: I felt anxious and noticed a pull to keep things light. The client’s shoulders dropped; pace sped up.
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Abstract Conceptualisation: Possible fear of conflict (mine). Rupture-repair model suggests naming the shift; pluralistic approach invites checking preference.
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Active Experimentation: Next session I’ll say, “When anger came up last time we moved on quickly. Would you like to touch back on it, and if so, what pace would feel OK?”
Using reflective practice ethically
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Confidentiality: anonymise notes; avoid identifiable details in journals.
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Supervision: take brief extracts or themes; ask for feedback on your experiment.
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Self-care: if reflection slips into self-criticism, pause; use a self-compassion prompt (e.g., “this is hard, and I’m learning”).
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Records: keep reflections factual and proportionate; note any agreed changes to your approach.
Common pitfalls (and what to do instead)
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Pitfall: staying in feelings without moving to action.
Instead: always finish by naming one small experiment. -
Pitfall: leaping to fixes without reflecting.
Instead: sit with what happened and why before planning a change. -
Pitfall: perfectionism or all-or-nothing goals.
Instead: choose tiny, testable steps you can review next week.
Benefits you’ll notice over time
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Clearer decisions in the room and less second-guessing afterwards.
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Better client outcomes through small, responsive changes.
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Greater self-awareness and steadier confidence.
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Sustainable practice — learning without the harsh inner critic.
If you’re a therapist or trainee wanting support with reflective practice, supervision can help you turn reflections into thoughtful action. You’re welcome to get in touch.